How to reduce the most stress in the least amount of time.

The following twelve strategies are designed to help you eliminate the most stress in the least time. 

1. Stop passing judgement. When you honk at bad drivers, get annoyed at the people who talk in the movies, or feel frustrated when a coworker impolitely interrupts, YOU are the one who suffers - NOT the person who has committed the infraction. So whenever you hear yourself thinking like a judge and jury - banish these negative thoughts from the courtroom of your mind - and you'll banish an enormous amount of stress too.
   
2. Allow extra time. Time pressure is a major source of stress. Next time you snap at the kids, feel stressed in a traffic jam or get chewed out by your boss, look below the surface. Time pressure is often the culprit. To counteract this stressor, build in extra time for kids who will dawdle, for traffic that will become congested and assignments that will take longer than you think. When you take this simple advice you'll be amazed how much stress you'll circumvent.
   
3. Create a comfortable morning routine. When you start your day feeling rushed and frazzled, knowing you have more than you can possibly do in the time allotted, your stress levels will skyrocket. To avoid this unpleasant scene, make your lunch, choose your outfit and get organized the night before. Go to bed a little earlier and set your alarm a little earlier too. (30 minutes should do the trick.) Now wake up, stretch, enjoy your coffee and don't rush. But plan on getting to work at least 10 minutes early. Wait till you see how this simple strategy changes your whole day.
   
4. Take a shower at the end of the day instead of the beginning. It feels great, it helps you relax (only cuts into TV time which is not relaxing), you won't have to rush and (we promise) you won't get dirty over night. When you flip flop this activity around it will free up an extra 20-30 minutes in the morning when you need it most.
   
5. Practice genuine forgiveness. When you hold a grudge, you also hold a toxic dose of anger. You carry this anger everywhere you go, and it radiates out and affects loved ones and others for which the anger is not intended. It's a well known fact that anger can raise your blood pressure, clog your arteries and lead to heart disease. But when you really forgive people (beside cleansing your system of toxic anger) you'll be eliminating an enormous burden of stress, too. As author, Dr. Dean Ornish says: "Just about the most selfish thing you can do is to forgive other people."
   
6. Get organized. Disorganization is stressful. Clean your desk, tidy your car, organize your closets. You won't believe how much less stressed you'll be.
   
7. Only worry with a writing instrument. Take comfort in the fact that most worries never come to pass and things worth worrying about usually hit you by surprise. So force needless worries out of your mind, and only allow yourself to worry when you can make a list of what's troubling you or talk over your worries with a trusted friend.
   
8. Living in the moment. When you first wake up in the morning, do you lie there and enjoy the warmth of your bed (living in the moment) or do you worry about the day ahead? When you take a shower, do you enjoy how good the hot water feels (living in the moment) or do you think about something your boss might have said to you the day before? When you stand in a long line at the bank do you make a point to talk to person next to you (living in the moment) or do you just stand there feeling frustrated? When you go places with your children are you really there with them - talking and interacting (living in the moment) - or are you somewhere else, reliving some unpleasant interaction you had with someone else that you can never change.
   
   When we detach ourselves from our lives in this way, not only are we missing out on moments that will never come again, the places we go to in our minds are often filled with pain and suffering. We criticize ourselves. (Why can't I afford a car like that?) We nit pick. (My spouse didn't put the milk away again!) We feel guilty. (I should have spent more time at the office this week!) We worry. (What if the economy never recovers?) We get angry. (My co-worker is so rude.) And we feel resentful. (That little weasel didn't deserve a promotion.) This insane voice is the source of more stress than you can calculate. But you can turn this voice off simply by tuning into the moment (In the ways we have described in the first paragraph).
   
   Another way to turn this voice off is by engaging in activities that produce flow. Flow comes about during activities that are so gratifying and satisfying that, when you're done, you say to yourself, where did the time go? Whether it's a job you love, a hobby you really enjoy, dancing, listening to great music, or reading a great book, during periods of flow the voice in your head goes away and you fully immerse yourself in what you are doing. In a sense, living in the moment occurs automatically during these times. So whether you consciously try to live in the moment, or find activities that produce flow, either way, you will quiet the mind and eliminate an extraordinary amount of stress.
   
9. Call a friend. Your network of friends may be the most powerful stress management tool you have at your disposal. Cultivate friendships with people who can make you laugh and/or listen attentively and call them whenever you feel low.
   
10. Learn to say no. Too many volunteer activities will make you crazy. Write down five different ways to say no and practice saying them until the words roll off your tongue. Start with: Let me check my calendar and I'll get back to you.
    
11. Skip the 11 O'clock news. Most news programs over-emphasize death and disaster to get you hooked. You don't need this in your head the last thing before you go to bed at night. Turn off the TV at ten and read something interesting or inspirational before you go to bed instead.
    
12. Be grateful. Make a mental list of all the things you have to be grateful for and say them to yourself before you got to bed at night. You'll be amazed at how relaxing and reassuring this little exercise can be.

Most people believe that stress is the result of events and circumstances they can't control, like a flat tire, a traffic jam or a missed deadline. But to a large extent it's your thinking about these that is the true source of your distress. You may not be able to control what happens to you, but you CAN control your reaction to it. Knowing this simple fact, and using some of the techniques described above will put you in the driver's seat of your life.